My Children, My World

It was ten o'clock on the evening of June 19 as I lay in contractions on a sort of torture device that the hospital referred to as a bed. The pain was just bearable, but I was scared. This was my first child and she was coming early. I was trying so hard to follow the instruction to "push". It seemed to accomplish nothing. I had come to the hospital only after careful deliberation with my mother on the phone 300 miles away whether I was in fact, in labour. I decided to go and there I was, terrified of the next step. I had bonded with the life inside my belly, squirming and turning while I read to her, sang to her and caressed her to the best of my ability. Up to this moment she was just an idea, a potential being. I had grown accustomed to the relationship in this manner. This new development indicated a change in that relationship and I was panic stricken over the question of my ability to adjust. People have kids and work and strive to better the lives of each generation. This was normal, right? I would soon find out that just because we do things that are deemed "normal" does not mean it's the right thing to do for us.

The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse

Creatively, I have drawn a similarity to the prophecies in the Book of Revelations which eludes to four horsemen as being the face of the day of judgment. For all of those who may put stock into Christian beliefs, please look at the connection of the current climate of civilization and the apocalyptic notion. There have been several interpretations of the prophecies, as is common practice for varying groups. In an attempt to bridge the gap between vague, divine ideas and modern day conditions, I have made the following connections, as there is no doubt that the Bible is a most powerful book.
There are four immediate threats to civilization, no small declaration, which require immediate global awareness. I am not an authority on such things and you need not be either to gain important insights. I am a humble sheep in the flock that is being herded onto the truck headed for for the slaughter house, just as you are, but I have noticed a warning from the corner of my eye and I attempt to draw the attention of the multitudes of sheep running up the ramp and into the truck. Don't go into the truck! Notice the beautiful green field just beside it!
As I listened to the words of a group of very learned men I was surprised and filled with great anticipation to realize

Life is a journey, not a destination

We all seem to live with a goal in mind. Some are big goals, some are little goals, whichever drives you I know you will have to admit that there is always a destination in sight. "When I'm older I will do things my way and life will be great, when I graduate high school I will have the freedom to pursue what I choose and life will be great, when I get that ideal job, life will be great, when the kids are more independent, life will be great, if I could just get that promotion, life will be great, When I retire, we can travel and do whatever and life will be great". Sound familiar? We all think that once we accomplish the next goal we will have arrived. We seem to move this way continually throughout our lives, never learning that we never get there. Every accomplishment seems to attach itself to a new destination.

We're All Doomed

I'm sure every generation has faced the sense that they would be the final generation to exist on earth. There has always been the end looming through the history of time. The end has always been nigh. I remember the dark sense of my environment during the time of the Vietnam war, radiating from those of my parent's generation. I remember having a sense that Nixon was the face of the end. These senses filled me with the dark, cold panic of nothingness, as if soon nothing would be left but the low, pounding vibrations of my deserted heart in a cold mist that kept me from breath...and the fear was born. The same messages still reach my ears. 2012 will be the last year for us... Again the end is nigh.
So what of it? Mankind can usually find a way to plod along on this earth through every generation that thinks it's the last, so I wont so easily be sold on the end this time, but what if it is? If you think about it... It really is.